Inside.

What a boring birthday I had this year. It's really boring without my sisters and all of my friends. I hate myself. I just feel like I need someone to be there for me. Unfortunately, there's no one good enough. I put my hopes up too high for this guy and yet, he blows me. He blows that chance. Yes, that chance could've been a golden to someone. But yet, he doesn't appreciate. I know him better. He's never been like this. He's changed a lot.

Btw he asked me to teach him on how to treat ME. Omg omg omg ye memang boleh but sumpah, can you stand on your own effort? Like you used to? Like the old days? I know, you are better than this. It's seems like you're drifting away from me and when you want me, you'll come. And when you're busy, you're done. That is not a definition of relationship. I'm not getting mad or anything. I'm just being curious. I just want to know, what makes you being like this.

I always remember all of those good times we had for each other. The moment when we both are willing to do anything, for us. The moment that we shared everything together just to feel a lot better. The moment when we tried to fix our problem and knowing that with a fight is not the only way out. The moment when we take away our ego just to heal the problems. I miss it. I miss it. I know how fragile my feeling was right now. It's just I start to be so sensitive when I know that I need you and sometimes, you weren't there. And that disappoints me the most.

I love you. I love us. Please don't do this to me. I can't barely hide my tears anymore. I just want you to know how awful I feel right now and how bad I want this to end. I want the normal 'us', like we used to be. I miss you.

"Treat your girl right, 

or somebody else will."